I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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