He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
