id be glad to
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
