next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
