I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Alive.
So much puke
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Randomize
