I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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