waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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