I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I showed him my bush... on skype.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize