I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
