You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
My balls are so social today.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
