Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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