She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
