Sry I called you an 8
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I just gargled with NyQuil
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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