you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
two words: eviction party
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I believe in your delicious
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
