singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
