An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I think my moral compass just broke
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
