So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
