What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
