I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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