So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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