There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize