and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize