Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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