we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
