she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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