She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I intend to get homeless drunk
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Randomize
