Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
