her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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