He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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