i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize