Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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