I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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