So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
