My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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