you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
