So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize