He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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