Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
