she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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