hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize