I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
