Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
That accounts for only three of the penises
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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