New invention idea: vibrating tampons
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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