Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
He better not be in your backpack
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Randomize
