tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
the liver wants what the liver wants
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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