Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
this hospital has no fireball
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize