i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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