I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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