His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
