your thong is hanging out like whoa
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Randomize
