: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
