How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
